So, in my youth, I was desperate for a truly deep and committed relationship. I never really found it then. My life was full of haphazard affairs and less than loyal women who were in it less for the relationship than for a quick means of forgetting that OTHER guy who was always more charming, awesome, cool, and manly. Generally, THAT guy would have left them for some other lady, but, of course, that’s what men did then, yes? And so I kept dreaming of that perfect relationship. That one love that would never leave and I’d be complete because she’d love me for me and not tolerate me as a minor replacement until the next manly stud came along. Happy to say that I finally found that one perfect love and I’ve been married to her for the last going on seven years and together for twelve.
Yet, for the decades before then, I was pretty much the lonely fellow always looking in all the wrong places. Then one night I had this especially vivid dream that I didn’t want to wake up from. But wake up I did. And the one I was supposed to be with was not yet there. Alas, another empty night and empty bed with an empty room catering a throbbing head! …After a hangover that is, not… well… moving on!
Enjoy this little poem I wrote after waking up that night! Fortunately, I’m no longer quite as whiny as I was then. I told my wife sometimes I feel like that one poetic character Brendan Fraser played in Bedazzled for one scene. Everything just made me tearbend! It’s so beautiful! Anyhow, the poem!
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THIS PLACE THAT’S FILLED WITH YOU
Darkness surrounds me as your image fades
Sweat sticks upon this fragile body as it thumps up
I wake up and find you’re gone
Your scent lingers on
This place that’s filled with you
~~~
Shadows mar the walls, I realize the sad truth
You were never there, you’re just a phantom
A dream that haunts my soul
Why do I wake up?
This place that’s filled with you
~~~
I never want to wake up
You’re there nurturing me, telling me it’s all right
Always supporting me, giving me the strength to fight
There’s nothing I can’t handle, your arms that hold me so tight
This place that’s filled with you
~~~
I never want to let go
I can’t get you out of my mind
Even if you are just a dream
I love you, you’re a part of me
This place that’s filled with you
~~~
Help me to keep it together
Show me the way through the darkest night
Are you an illusion? Is it just me?
Where did you come from? Why can’t you stay?
This place that’s filled with you
~~~
Someday I will wake up
I will find you were always there
You will come home, I will be waiting
There’ll be no more living, with a broken heart
This place that’s filled with you
~~~
This place that’s filled with you
When will I find it
This place that’s filled with you
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And there you go! You know, I used to have greater control over the look of my page here. Ever since they went to a block system, I haven’t been able to format these presentations to my heart’s content. Grrr. Anyhow, There was no rhyme or reason to how this particular poem was written. Just a stream of emotions and I want to thank you for reading them. Hope you enjoyed and see you all next year! Bye!
~Timothy S Purvis
